enid has officially moved to the big apple and for some reason her move affected me more than i thought it would. at least when i first found out about it anyways. i find this very strange as prior to start of college, jon moved away to michigan and i didn't shed a tear until i saw his very depressing video roaming the halls of the dorms. but then i came to visit during xmas break and all was better in the world. james moved to irvine, gaga moved to berkeley, victor and jimmy moved to la and not one tear. more like a wave of a hand. i can't even be too sure we hugged. grace stayed close but i still never really saw her. maybe because i just knew we would all eventually end up in san diego again and my prediction basically came true. everyone is back and now it's me that lives the furthest away.

but for enid it was different. i felt like it was the closing of one chapter and the beginning of another while in the other instances, the chapter never closed. i'm not quite sure what it is but maybe it's because she's my first close friend to move post-college. first little dent in my bubble of san jose. i felt the need to plan a big clubbing nite (of which i forgot my id and the doorman had napoleon syndrome and demanded i leave because i was causing a disturbance), make her a scrapbook and sing our hearts out on karaoke night. there's no doubt in my mind we're going to keep in touch but it's different. maybe this is the difference between one of your childhood friends moving away versus a friend you met later on.

or it could be all of our parents live in san diego so we're bound to be back one time or another. whatever it is...i don't like it but i know it can't be helped. many more of my friends will be moving from san jose in the next couple years, myself included possibly and well, i guess it's just part of growing up.

i miss new york but more importantly, i just miss everyone. it was a ridiculously fun trip and i probably spent a little bit too much money but it was all well worth it. my effort in getting jon drunk by buying him corona after corona failed miserably but hey you can't fault me for trying. i did however succeed in getting myself quite tipsy along the way. us stupid californians (with the exception of the sagging monk) decided to leave sunday and missed sam's bbq but james has promised me he'll be photoshopping me, jon, victor and tien in. isn't he a great brother? we'll all be one big happy family now.

everyone can rest easy. i am one happy happy girl! my faith in the bachelor has been restored. so he strayed a bit but he came to his senses. even during kirsten's speech in the limo after being r-e-j-e-c-t-e-d all i could shout was bitch. you lost. yes go throw up. nobody cares. i'm being so mean and spiteful that even i'm a little scared of myself at this point but jen's engaged and that's all that really matters in the end isn't it? don't forget to watch the interview with the newlyweds wednesday night.

i know it's sad that i get so riled up about a tv show but i can't help myself. i'm sitting here now watching my taped finale of the bachelor and i find myself rolling my eyes each time kirsten comes up on screen and i'm even shouting at the tv because i want jen to win it so badly. i mean guys please tell me. is it just me that finds kirsten so fake and bitchy? while jen on the other hand is genuine, warm, sincere...and the list goes on and on. a lot of my guy friends think kirsten is hotter but i honestly don't think so. even taking out kirsten's bitchy attitude and basing it only on looks i find jen much better. i've rooted for her from the beginning.

just to show you how addicted i am to this show, i had bren tape it for me while we went bowling and i haven't taped anything since college. i really should be packing for new york or getting rest as jon says since i'm sick but i can't. i must know who wins and it's all i can do right now to not check it on the website. when i see jen and andrew together i get all giddy but with him and kirsten i can feel the anger boiling in my stomache.

i guess what i'm trying to say here through my ramblings and my anger is how how how can andrew be so blind? can he not see how fake she is? is he that blinded by her looks that he cares about nothing else? i mean even his brother had doubts about her and her sisters inferred in a very polite firestone way that she has no substance. hello mr andrew firestone. please wake up! i'm watching kirsten right now trying to bullshit her way through her lie and andrew is falling for it. does he have blinders on?

ugh...i can't blog anymore i'm getting so upset. i must concentrate on the show but let's just say depending on the outcome of this i will either be a very happy girl or very bitter. i just hope i still have the energy to pack after this is all over.

sororities and fraternities. what is the appeal really? not only are you someone's bitch for a month during initiation but you can't even complain about it because well...you voluntarily asked for this. going through hazing or whatever it's called now and then one month later those people are supposed to be your sisters? or brothers? give me a break. and those hazing activities i've heard is no small feat either. why would your future friends even want you to run and chug beer until you puke? and that's just the easiest task. why would you want to be friends with them anyways? i never had to make a fool out of myself for my closest friends. i do that out of my free will (something i'm quite proud of by the way). i never quite understood why sororities and fraternities were so popular in college. i suppose it's good for meeting a bunch of people right away but couldn't you just join one of the clubs on campus instead? for free? and it sounds impressive on your resume. especially if you join a dorky sounding one like student accounting society. and volunteer to be an officer. as weird as it may sound, i met all of my close friends from college at SAS. i'm even a bridesmaid at one of their weddings this summer. who says accountants aren't cool.

i did foray into the initiation world of sororities my sophomore year at state. not quite sure what came over me but there i was, among lots of blonde girls in cute little sundresses. and then there was me, a lone asian in jeans. i wasn't quite sure what to expect going in but at the very first meeting who do i see...katie abbot. seeing her there threw me for a loop because she was so unlike the type of girls i imagined in sororities that it instantly threw a little bit of my stereotypical image out the window. we bonded and endured the week of rush coming upon us. i went from house to house watching their acts and sitting through boring interviews with perky girls asking me "where are you from? what's your name? let me tell you why you should join alpha chi omega". there was one where they did a cowboy song and dance number and there was haystacks all over the house with the girls dancing on top that i thought was pretty cute but that's about as far as it went.

it was pretty funny actually to see what each house was known for. this little piggy has the sluts. this little piggy has the hottest chicks. and this little piggy gets straight a's but no boys. that house was virtually drooling to have me join. their winning pitch was "we all have gpa's above 3.7, study hour is from 7 - 9pm and we even have old exams you can study from!" wowzers i must join then!

i lasted all of one week. went to all the houses, met all the girls, put down my rankings of which i liked the best and just didn't show up one day. my leader called to express her disappointment in me but i didn't really care. i wasn't expecting any of the houses to want me either...i'm sure they could see me rolling my eyes but surprisingly i got a lot of callbacks. so i thought i'd give it one more try and went to dessert night and i'm sure you can guess how that went seeing how i don't think very highly of sororities and fraternities to this day.

i don't know very many people in sororities but the ones i have met were all very cool. i think maybe it's only when they get in groups the girls become catty and the boys become obnoxious. my perception has been even more solidified by watching sorority life and fraternity life recently. however, if i did join, i'm sure my guy friends would all be very happy as i would certainly have more girlfriends than i do now and wouldn't their heads just explode if i joined one of the hot ones?

xbox live. this has got to be one of the most exciting inventions to date. i've spend a good part of the night watching tri and bren play wolfenstein, halo and now nhl hockey 2k3. i've heard bren rave tons of times before about how great xbox live is going to be and how he can't wait until it comes out but i never really listened. i've gotten quite used to tuning him out when necessary. this is the first time really where i'm actually seeing this xbox live thing in action and the seriousness of it all is coming clear. how ridiculous is it that you can now play video games with other nerds all around the world? and you can even talk to them! back in the days of mario and contra did anyone ever fathom this day would come? i certainly didn't. what can possibly be next for video games? virtual perhaps? or is that out already and i'm just behind?

bren keeps wanting to play hockey or halo while i talk on the headset so the person getting whooped will think he's getting beat by a girl. but i just wouldn't know what to say. i don't know any video game lingo.

i must say i am in awe. just a couple weeks ago i was playing tennis on his gameboy advance sp and marvelling at how tiny it was. and now this xbox live thing.

i can't wait to get my "opening the xbox" book in the mail. bill gates is a genius no doubt.

what is it like to grow up hating your face? i'm sitting here watching extreme makeover and i'm fascinated. i don't even know where to begin. everyone has things here and there they wish were different (unless you're a hot sexy mama like hugh jackman...my newest vavavavoom guy) but over time you learn to accept what you're born with and appreciate those things that make you unique. but what if you're just not good looking? am i being too harsh? everytime you look in the mirror the person looking back at you in no way whatsoever reflects the mental image of what you think you should look like. what to do? the answer apparently is to call extreme makeover and beg. and hope your face is sorry enough to be chosen. but this is no fashion emergency. you can basically request anything. want bigger boobs? done. want a smaller nose? done. want a facelift? done. heck why don't we just transplant gisele's face onto yours? sure why not.

what happened to the days when you just accepted what you were given? the before and after images of these people is unrecognizable. is cosmetic surgery the answer to our insecurities? are we so narcissistic that changing our outward appearance is a direct reflection of our self-worth and self-esteem? the answer to this is yes. we live in a time where what exists on the outside is more important than that of the inside. to strangers at first glance anyways. it's a well known reality that good looking people get special treatment whether it be at work or something small like a bigger scoop of ice-cream. it's no wonder then that we're so willing to go under the knife to achieve the coveted look of what society deems beautiful.

it's sad really but the reality is i can't wait to see what they look like at the end of the hour.

online dating. i asked sanford over the weekend if he would ever consider joining match.com or a similar service and his answer was an emphatic N-O! i would have to agree. over the weekend i was watching this mtv special on speed dating and i have to say, most of the people they interviewed seemed pretty normal. sure some of them seemed to be geeky and perhaps really did need a little help in the dating scene but overall, seemed ok to me. there's such a stigma surrounding online dating that even if i did participate, i would deny deny deny. no i am not a member...i swear!

i wonder, will there ever be a time when it gets so hard to meet new people or you feel like the people you're meeting aren't just cutting it that you'd resort to chatting and scouring profiles online to find the "one". one of my friend's roomate met his fiancee on match.com. only success story that i know of. one thing is for sure, the older you get the harder it becomes to meet interesting and cute people to date. ideally you'd like to meet them through your friends but over time, that avenue will be exhausted. ditto for clubs and bars. i don't care how nice you are, if you try to pick up a girl at a club, she's going to think you're slimy. at least i do.

one thing i noticed from the special is that everyone got along great on the phone and chatting online but when it came time to meeting in person, one of them always felt the other wasn't attractive enough. and everyone always lists personality as the number one wanted trait. please. call me shallow but physical attractiveness has got to be up there...if not number one on my list. i don't care how nice or charming or great a guy's personality is, if i'm not attracted to him physically, there's really no hope. now this isn't to say that i have the greatest taste all the time or that guys can't move up on my physical scale but for the most part, when i first meet someone i can usually tell right away if he could be a "potential" in the future.

in this day and age of the technology boom, online dating is one arena i don't really care to participate in. i'll take my dates the old fashioned way thank you very much. although they did show this one thing where you meet 25 guys or girls and you sit and talk to them for 5 minutes each and then you rate them yes or no. at the end of the night you turn in your sheet and if there's a match, the service will send off the email addresses for you to contact. i found this kind of intriguing. not so desperate and even if it doesn't work out romantically, it seems like a cool way to meet new people.

of course come back to me in 5 or 10 years when i'm older and maybe i won't be bashing on online dating. i'll be a proud participate in all dating services out there. ha.

thomas kinkade. i recently found out that one of the reasons why he is so popular is because his paintings usually show light coming out of a house or some other object which symbolizes god. "painter of light". i've definitely heard of thomas kinkade before but never really knew just how popular he was until now. the client that i'm on for the next month or so is the only company that has the rights to manufacture, produce and distribute his prints or paintings.

the building that i'm working in is surreal. i pull up tuesday morning to two huge buildings that resemble more a museum than a corporation. walking in there's plush chairs and kinkade paintings everywhere on the walls along with a shelf filled with mugs, photo book albums, christmas tree ornaments, pillows, picture frames...basically anything you can plaster his paintings on while still being considered classy.

to all my artistic friends, tell me...why is thomas kinkade so popular? call me ignorant but i thought he was dead up until a couple days ago. you would think for such a nice building they would put us in a decked out conference room but nope. we're stuck in the "licensing" room where we're surrounded by little knick knacks everywhere although we do get nice leather chairs. that's a lot better than some of the other places i've been put in. and oh, another plus...we have a hub. whee! someone save me...i'm stuck here for a month doing 404 work and to my fellow work friends who read this site (i know who you are), lemme tell you, you're in for a treat.

oh the glamorous life of an auditor.

so i was screwed over on friday afternoon and i decided that instead of hiding my face in shame i should share my stupidity so you don't end up making the same mistake as i did. of course if you even have one ounce of sensibility, you probably would never fall for this type of scam anyways but before i carry on, i'd just like to say...in defense of my actions, all of this occurred just a couple hours after my hit and run as mentioned in my previous blog, it was friday afternoon meaning my mind wasn't all there and um...let's see what else...my salad had an ill effect on me?

for whatever the reason, i start from the beginning. a couple of days ago, i received an email proclaiming that i've won a 3 day and 2 night stay to either vegas, ft. lauderdale or orlando. my choice. now we all have heard the horror stories but my mind flashed to caro when she received something of a similar nature (or at least i thought she did) and she partook in a glamorous cruise to the bahamas with quite a little discount. well maybe not entirely glamorous but i do remember specifically that when she came back i asked how the accomodations were because i was quite the skeptical little monkey and she said everything was great.

so lo and behold i get this email and against all my better judgement i decide to call in and redeem my certificate. as soon as i do, a message appears proclaiming that i need to call within 48 hours to reserve my spot which really should have been warning sign numero uno but i do. i call in and proceed to spend 30 minutes or more on the phone. "m'am if you like for $400 we can extend your vacation to 7 days and 6 nights and as a bonus we'll include a free rental car with unlimited mileage." i hesitate and before i can take a deep breath a manager is on the line with me. "m'am we'll knock off $100 on your package and if money is an issue we'll bill you the $150 now and the other half later." ferverishly i aim to nancy and brian c….should i do it? what do i do? images of me sitting on a beach with a pina colada in my hand melts away any doubts i may have had. looking back, second warning sign should have been when i asked if i could decide later and received the classic response "m'am this is a special promotion and such a good deal that i'm afraid once you get off the phone your reservation will go on to the next customer". need i continue? i'm sure you know what's coming. so i agree to the extended package and the $150 on my credit card while little beads of sweat are forming on my forehead. hey i'm a virgo and i don't do rash impulsive things. we're practical creatures. bill the mastercard please.

as soon as i'm off brian c responds did they have a website? is there a number? did you research? uhhh..let me check on the website. so i google in "ramada resorts plaza" and lo and behold what do I find? "ramada resorts plaza - SCAM!" i couldn't believe my eyes. i was in denial. this couldn't possibly be the same ramada that i just got off the phone with? as they say in AA, number one step is denial. i sent the link to nancy so she could share in my shock and as i read horror story after horror story detailing exactly what i did i was forced to come to terms that yes, i have become a statistic and can now join the millions of americans who despite all the warnings and news stories, continue to fall for scams. i guess it is true what they say...if it seems too good to be true, it probably is.

so the moral of the story? if you get a solicitation email from RAMADA PLAZA RESORTS hit delete. i'm actually not that upset about all this since i haven't yet tried to get a refund so i'm still convinced that i will (there were lots of successful refund stories on that website which nancy will attest to) and at least it was only $150 maximum. which is still a lot don't get me wrong but after reading the website and finding out that most people had been duped of $700 or more, i can laugh at this situation and blog about it instead of ranting and raving as i did with jon's my so called life dvd debacle. for which i still have not received my credit. ahem.

i was involved in a hit and run today during lunch! i was sitting in sabrina's car driving to zanotto's (a high class supermarket in case you don't know) and as we're driving along this white van that was making a left from the oncoming traffic suddenly appeared in front of us. i felt as if everything was happening in slow motion. i just remember the van getting closer and closer and me thinking i'm going to get hit, i'm going to get hit and i better move my legs up so they don't get crushed. sabrina slams on the brakes and we hit. BOOM. actually it was more like boom. the hit really wasn't all that bad surprisingly. double props to sabrina's brakes.

so we pull over and we're expecting the van to also but next thing we know, it just takes off. what?!?!?! all these bystanders come running over yelling "did the van just take off? are you ok? you need to contact your insurance company." and THEN this sheriff car pulls up next to us and was like "was it the van that hit you guys? stay right here and i'm going to try to find her." apparently the sheriff was waiting at a red light and saw the entire incident.

so sabrina and i climb back into her car and we wait. and wait some more. all the while we're chit-chatting and then we noticed 4 or 5 police cars just pass us by. what's going on? it's like 30 minutes now and nobody is coming back for us. we're afraid to just leave since we were told specifically to stay. stay spot stay. then this lady who goes around in her little car issuing tickets stops in front of us and was about to write us a ticket so we jump out and explain the entire thing to her. she talks through her walkie talkie and she's like yup yup they just arrested someone. my eyes are big at this point. wow...this is just like a movie. yup yup it's a lady in a van (that must be our girl!). we're told to wait once again and that a cop is coming for us. then she just takes off.

we climb back into her car again and sure enough, five minutes later, a cop pulls up behind us. i jump out again and we're asking about the lady that was arrested until we realize, this cop has no idea what we're talking about. in fact, he stopped to ask us what we were doing parked in a freight loading zone. another cop stops by. and i say out loud "maybe this cop will know what's going on" which seemed to make cop #1 not too happy. so, sabrina and i go over the ENTIRE story again...this time with our arms flailing and a witness even stopped by to pronounce that yes he saw the entire accident happen and that contrary to belief, these two girls are not nuts.

now both cops are staring at us like we're stupid. he takes a look at the damage...very minimal...just a little black mark and he's like well, i don't know where the sheriff that told you guys to wait is, no one was arrested recently so if you want, you guys can just leave.

what? i'm all for leaving because really this has gotten to be much more trouble than warranted but i did leave scratching my head. what happened to the sheriff and why did the traffic lady say someone was arrested for our accident?

there is a fairy tale ending to all this. we made our way safely to zanatto's and chowed down on a big green salad with arizona raspberry ice-tea.

i missed the bachelor last night. first time since the premiere episode. but don't worry, i caught myself up this morning by reading the episode guide. i've determined that the bachelor reminds me a little of vi...they wear the same type of clothes, similar hair except vi's isn't that rumpled although it should be and they both move their mouth the same way when they talk. this was all confirmed by both bren and vu so it must be true. sanford informed me that the bachelor was having a private party up in sf and i considered for a brief nanosecond to crash it but what's the point. he could very well be married by now but just to get a glimpse to see if he's all that in person. i guess i'll never know.

in case you were wondering, my two favorites, jen c. and tina fabulous are still in the running. although i'm convinced that kirsten is going to get picked which would just crush mr bachelor's image in my eyes. i don't like her and yes i'm being catty.

is it just me or do white girls seem so much older than they really are? half of the girls on that show are 22 or 23 and they look way older. not that they're not good looking or anything but heck i'm 24 and still get carded to drink champagne at weddings. i wonder what it is. even contestants in miss teen usa look older than me and most of my girl friends. the few that i do have. not that i'm complaining of course. these days i'm all about being young and carefree...anything to avoid the "over the hill" comment. bleh.

is honesty always the best policy? i've been accused of making inconsiderate and hurtful statements and when confronted i always follow with my catch phrase "well, it's true isn't it?" this came as surprise to me since i consider myself to be very passive aggressive and rarely get into confrontations or during my times of annoyance (which is very rare of course...uh yeah), i just dial up grace, have a bitch session and everything is lovey dovey again.

but i've been told by more than one person that i'm very blunt or say things that come off as rude without even realizing it. but well, as they say, the truth hurts. i suppose i should think twice before blurting something out but really what's the fun in that. half the time i don't even know i'm doing it so how do you expect me to change? in truth, when people say just be honest with me or tell me as it is there's a little part of them that doesn't really mean it. i'm guilty of this myself. to take the all time cliche, when i try on clothes and ask, does this make me look fat? i'm not really expecting a yes answer. i'd much prefer the go around of it doesn't fit you properly or the color isn't right or whoever desgined that must be an idiot. anything as long as it doesn't mention the gut hanging over my pants.

however if you say my face over the years has become as round as a pumpkin then that's just plain mean. because well, sure i know my face has rounded out over the years (i used to have a sharp chin i swear) but really to compare it to a pumpkin? there must be something better to compare it to.

so to those i'm rude to. i do apologize. it's not on purpose. and for those times that it is, well can you really argue with truth?

i no longer have a favorite dj. for the past two or three years i've always tooted the horn of donald glaude and whenever possible, i'd go watch him at different venues. i even got a couple of my friends to like him but tonight, such a disappointment. i have cd's in my car that sound better than he does. actually i know i do because we were listening to them on the way back. he didn't even pump up the crowd like he usually does. that's the best part about him, when he goes nuts and the crowd reacts but i like to just stand in the corner and giggle to myself but not tonight. such a shame.

if i seem a bit out of it or repetitive, well it could be because i'm a little tipsy. i'm sitting here, on a thursday night forced to leave the club early because some people were bored and i guess i couldn't blame them. now i'm watching bren and sanford play tiger woods 2003 ps2 with a techno cd playing in the background that is actually really good and i'm trying to figure out if it's my cd or not because if it is, well damn don't i have good taste. actually i'll have to thank hailin for all my techno cd's and jon for all my non-techno cd's. and the chinese ones are purely my own selection. i rarely buy cd's since i think they're a waste of money and usually only listen to the radio (hence my horrible taste in music) so any donated burnt cd's is well received. in fact i think the hand me down cd's i get from jon is my only real foray into "good" music or so i'm told. who can understand those lyrics anyways?

there was a time when i used to go clubbing almost every thursday night but that stopped during my first year of work as i soon found out waking up friday mornings was no joke. james once said that when he thinks of clubbing he thinks of me. do i really club that much? yes i guess i do. but seriously, what do people do besides go clubbing on weekends? i always hear people rant left and right about how they're so sick of clubbing and yes i get that way too but what else is there to do? movies? dinner? lounge? i always get the itch to go after a couple of weeks away and well i figure i better get it out of my system now before i'm old and clubbing in my 30's or 40's. i know i always lament whenever i see old people at clubs. and i'm talking old. i saw this one guy once that was in his 60's i think with this big ass glowstick and dancing around in circles and it was just too much. i couldn't decide whether to stare in bewilderment or just laugh. i think i did a little of both.

i've always wanted to write a blog when i was tipsy just so i can re-read it the following morning and well i guess this is it. let's hope i'm able to wake up for work tomorrow morning.

what could be better than sitting here at work with a hot krispy kreme donut in my hand and a berkeley farms chocolate milk next to me. for some reason i've been having quite a penchant for chocolate milk recently. it all started when bren's mom made some homemade milk last week and ever since then i've been hooked. maybe it reminds me of the good old days when i would mix nestle quick (or is it hershey's?) into my milk and stir until my arms would get tired. ah the good old days. there was a brief moment at the counter when i contemplated getting the low fat chocolate milk to combat my krispy kreme but thankfully i came to my senses just in time.

this was my first trip to the krispy kreme store ever. the person i'm working with at the moment is from the UK and just working here for a couple months so last week i showed her in n' out and today it was krispy kreme. we both just wanted to see what all the fuss was about and personally i wasn't too impressed. i've had krispy kreme donuts before mind you but everyone keeps raving about the store and the sign that blinks when the donuts are hot (which i never saw by the way) and it was just hyped up way too much. it tastes just like ordinary donuts to me and the only cool thing maybe was getting to see them being made in the back but it certainly doesn't warrant a drive all the way to mountain view.

i'd much rather drive to cupertino village for my boba and ketchup rice. yum yum!

everyone says your early 20's is your time to party it up, let out your inhibitions and basically get it all out of your system so you won't regret anything later on. i'm 24 now so in a couple more months time i'll be starting my mid 20's phase. the thing is, i'm not sure if i'm ready to let go of my early 20's yet. i like the fact it still hasn't been that long since college (3 years isn't long right?), i still consider myself a relatively newbie in corporate america and i don't really need to think about the consequences of my decisions because well, that's for later when i'm older.

questions like where do i want to go in my career? where do i want to live? is this really what i want to be doing? who will i marry? etc etc. and the list is endless. my answer to all those is i'm only 24. i have plenty of time. but in truth my endless time is slowly creeping up on me. it doesn't seem so long ago that i remember moving into my studio by san diego state or purchasing my first car with my dad or being semi-nervous about starting work. and now it's three years later and it's gone by in a breeze. where does the time go?

everyone says age is just a number. yes it is but i have little mental timeframes of where and what stage people should be at depending on how old they are. this is all ingrained in me of course from watching too much junk tv. early 20's is partying. mid 20's is starting to figure out your career, who you'll marry and starting to settle down. late 20's (meaning 28 and 29) is when you're basically settled, no more dating and the start of raising a family.

i feel as if i can no longer revert to my same old excuse of "i'm only 24" and don't know better. but i don't want to think long-term as i'm quite happy in the present right now. my mom's words "you do know you're not young anymore right?" keep reverberating through my mind. i guess my saving grace is that most of my friends are same age or older and i quite like being the young one in the group. it makes me feel as if i have more time. as in so and so is two years older but is at the same place i am so i must have two more years extra time.

so to my older friends i do thank you. actually i guess another saving grace is that i look young so maybe i can push my but i'm only 24 excuse a little longer.

i wonder, is it possible to only want to be friends when two strangers of the opposite sex meet? i've noticed lately that if you have a boyfriend and meet a guy for the first time and you both exchange numbers, there's the connotation that one of you is interested. is this true?

i've pretty much determined that once you have a boyfriend, your guy friends are pretty much set for life. and vice versa perhaps. all the guy friends you've met prior to meeting your boyfriend is deemed "ok to hang out with". but after that, forget it. this really is a shame.

you can meet all the girlfriends you want, in fact i'm sure boyfriends encourage this but when it comes to guys. it's a no no. after all, why else would he ask for your number or want to hang out? it must be because he's interested. or i suppose the other scenario is if you meet new guys through a sibling. that i've deemed to be ok as all of jon's friends immediately become mine at some point or another.

it's really too bad jon has more girlfriends than guys.

anti-war protesters. don't like them. whenever i hear stories about anti-war protests in san francisco or people lying down on the streets of manhattan it really irritates me. i mean, we're already in the war the least we can do is support our troops. imagine, these are basically kids who have been sent to protect us and citizens in middle class surburbia are rioting against them. how absurd is that. the pow they rescued recently was a 19 year old girl who looks more like she's 12. what were you doing when you were 19? certainly not fighting for your life i can bet you that.

if you're like me, you're too chicken to ever enter into the military. so i rely on those men and women who do have the guts to go out there and protect us from an event like 9/11 ever happening again. and truth to be told, if you're reading this, you were probably brought up in a well to do middle class family whose children would more likely than not need to enroll in the military. why? because those who enroll in the military usually are fresh out of high school, need money to go to college and basically it's one of their only options to be independent. this isn't entirely the case of course but based on my experiences at camp pendleton.

it's so easy to get lost in our everyday lives of going to work and hanging out with friends and the war may seem like a million miles away which it is but the least we can do, i mean bare minimum least is support them. i don't care if you agree with the reasons of going to war or not, the fact is, we're there. we're not pulling out so be supportive and think twice before participating in any anti-war rallies and imagine the soldiers meandering their way through sandstorms, being homesick and sacrificing their lives so we can continue to live in our carefree ways.

and that's my two cents on the war.

i am red. like a lobster that has been cooked over and over again. me in only a t-shirt and pants with the sun blazing overhead snowboarding and no sunblock on my face. the thing is, i completely forgot about it and didn't really think of it again until the car ride home when my face kept getting hotter and hotter. anyone who has seen me recently knows how pale i've become and well...now i'm red. my face feels as if it's on fire, it hurts when i scrunch my nose and putting a towel to my face is torture.

even at lunch yesterday the waitress was like "is the reason why your face is so red because you were out in the sun?" uh yes dummy. and she just gave me this sad pitiful sympathetic look. i feel as if everyone is staring at me and i have this huge deformity on my face but all i can do is slather on some more after sun lotion and pray the peeling process comes soon.

you can bet next time i won't be forgetting my sunblock.

i have butterflies in my stomache. why? my newest crush is andrew firestone, the bachelor. i had seen pics of him online and my first reaction was wow, he's pretty cute but then after a couple more glances decided he really wasn't all that. but now, after sitting through the premiere episode, i've changed my mind. he's definitely the best bachelor to date. dark hair, cute dimples, nice bod (not too big but yet has muscles), wears a suit nicely, and there's just something about his smile. he even has a twinkle in his eye! but the clincher was the shot of him in his tinted blue sunglasses which just seemed to fit oh so well. a guy who can pull off tinted color sunglasses definitely has my vote.

i wasn't too impressed with the past two bachelors. alex. ugh. he's boring and too feminine. aaron. sure he's successful and has his own business but i just wasn't digging him. seemed too cocky and his smile was crooked. but andrew. i was completely giddy by the end of the one hour episode. it's yet to be seen of course whether this crush will last and as jon will tell you, i do develop them quite easily but fall out of them just as easily.

another thing i learned from watching this show. makeup does wonders. wonders i tell you. when they first showed the girls in their natural state i was quite disappointed cause andrew deserves better but then once they put their makeup on, i was floored. are these the same girls? whenever i put on makeup i look exactly the same or i just look like a painted clown with colors on her face. but i digress...we're talking about the bachelor here.

i can't wait until the next episode. now you know where i'll be wednesday nights at 9pm. parked in front of the television.